Can You Say That In English Please?

After work, I walked to the train station with Fiona, who is from Ireland. I was explaining that I thought I'd lost some weight:

"Before Japan, I worked at a movie theatre, and I ate so much candy and soda."

A bit later, it occurred to me that I hadn't hesitated using these words, even though we would both use "cinema" "sweets" and "fizzy drinks" back home. NOVA has Americani(z/s)ed me!

However, I refuse to spell things the American way. All that lack of "u"'s and "er" rather than "re" (for example, theatre) won't defeat me.

For Reasons Known

Because my head feels clear after the night before.
Because the sun is shining, and I walked to the shop in my sandals.
Because the Toyoko Line and Shinkansen both sped past me.
Because Mum's coming soon.
Because I saw Dan and Oli on webcam.
Because Fuji is out in full view today.
Because it feels like Summer.
Because this video is perfect.

durnk!

well, thetre had to be one postr where i was a little worse for wrear.

at the momet in touch typoing and doing pretyy wrell,! ut the truth is im absolutely watse,

it was fiona (the new girls ) welfoe tperaty tonight and i got a little bit sitptispy. pom tehtrain on the way home an japanesz e man felll over from being fedruni, and not just dtunk but he was properly asleepe and he wasnt wakijng up ebey thouhg people were nudging him. jusr lying ion the gfloor. was hilaiou and made me lauhg. .but because i was laughing eberyuon else astrated lauhgin, and i couldnt stp. im seveven leaughingn now. butg i gotta slepee cos i have a full day tomorrow. i think my typing i sgetting better

maybe nowet

Image Of The Week #29

Japanese Beauty:


This was floating around outside my apartment.

My Sympathy Didn't Last Long

Tom came home yesterday, and seems to be fine. Of course, he didn't ask how I was; but then again, he never did.

At the moment, he's on the phone to his Mum in the living room. I have my music up loud because he's talking at her like she's dirt. She's coming to visit in April and the highlight of the conversation:

"I've been staying in and watching DVDs. I've been into Tokyo a couple of times but really there's nothing to see, and no-where around here to go."

That makes me a combination of sad, confused, and angry.

It's Typical, Never An MRI And Then Two Come Along At Once

First off, Keiko got her results back from the MRI. She might have weak anaemia but apart from that, everything's fine.

However, last Friday I arrived back home and Bruce told me Tom had been taken to hospital. I decided that I wasn't going to write about either of them, as they weren't particularly important parts to my time here, but this is a worthwhile story.

A bit about Tom: he is a 28 year old Scottish guy who looks like a ginger Hagrid from Harry Potter and sounds every bit as indecipherable as him; no idea what the students must think. He's a very inhibited and strange person; if we go out, he'll sit in the corner facing away from everyone. Crazily, he only ventured into Tokyo after being here six months. He's very stubborn and if you suggest something, he will do the opposite. Which is up to him, but when it's a case of asking him to keep his door or window closed in Summer because the mosquitoes were driving Bruce and I crazy, he opened it more. He sits in the house on his days off watching old movies and eating Cup Noodles. He has had a cough for the last four months, and eventually I bought him medicine from the pharmacy and made him take it. And, if there needs to be an and, he joined the gym, went twice and then didn't go for five months after; each month costing him £50 but because we told him to cancel his contract, he refused to, saying he would once his cough became better. Which was never. Sounds like a top guy, I know.

Apparently, he woke up one afternoon on his day off, like normal, set for a fun-filled day of movies and Soup Noodles, and his back suddenly went. He crawled across the floor, almost passing out and phoned the ambulance. 3 men came but, due to the size of him, it took 4 more to carry him on a stretcher to the ambulance.

It appears that a disc deteriorated and pushed into his spinal cord, temporarily paralysing him. He had to stay in hospital for a week, only finding out which hospital and where it was when Bruce and I asked him. He decided not to tell his parents, although I can to some extent agree with him on that one.

According to the doctors, he'll be fine after a week of recovery and some rehab, but I'm not sure. I'm not an expert so have no idea why this happened, but I think you can assume that his lifestyle didn't help.

I don't think he'll be able to sit down properly in a cubicle for 8 lessons a day, and I think he's a bit in denial that he may have to go back to Scotland.

I visited him on Sunday in a hospital that could've been the set for House On Haunted Hill; you enter on the 4th floor. Poor guy was placed on the death ward, there being the only room for him. I felt bad for him as he was so bored and frustrated that I stayed for about an hour and a half; the longest we'd ever spent talking together. I brought his iPod which was a real blessing considering the men either side of him were constantly coughing, and a nurse had to drain out the liquid in their lungs every 10 or so minutes. A really disturbing noise.

Still, the silver lining was that he got a sponge bath from a cute nurse and politely accepted when she asked if he wanted his "pehniss" cleaned. Tom told me, with a sparkle in his eye, that she gave it a good scrub, both inside and outside. Read that as you will.

He comes home tomorrow. I do feel sorry for him, but my sympathy is going to depend on if he sorts himself out.

The saddest thing about it all is that only Bruce and I visited him. I was going to go again because he was so bored, but Bruce managed to persuade a few other people to go. I guess in this situation, the amount of people that visit you in hospital is a good indication of your success living in a foreign country and knowing a good 3/400 students. I'd hope a few more than two would want to stop by if I was there.

Oh, and Keiko and Tom both said the MRI was just like the movies; incredibly claustrophobic and noisy. When asked if she had any questions, the machine was turned on and even though Keiko tried to get the nurse's attention, she failed to through the racket.

Big Brother Is Still Watching You

The VOICE room looks a little bare, after all the fiction books that lined the bookshelf were removed last week. The reason? The selection of books wasn't standardised across all branches.

Heaven forbid a student should learn some English the natural way.

Day 4

(Finally, I’ve had the time to sit down and write this. For logic’s sake, these entries will be moved in a week’s time so that they lie next to the rest of the trip.)

The next day, we headed South of Tokyo and Yokohama to the crowd-pleasing Kamakura region. With a lot to see and do, it was another early start, but one of those places where even if you can’t see everything (there being over 200 temples), it’s a shame to miss part of the main sights due to timing problems.



This Buddha statue carved into wood was reminiscent of the tree that had grown around the figure that I saw in Thailand.

The weather again was kind to us, and it made walking between the temples comfortable.

One of the best memories of the trip was that we went in the middle of 七五三 (shichi-go-san or 7-5-3) a coming-of –age celebration when boys of 3 and 5 and girls of 3 and 7 visit shrines with their families. Originating in the Heian Period, this was the time when boys, in the samurai class, were allowed to grow out their hair, and girls could begin to wear more complicated kimono. One of the biggest traditions is to eat 千歳飴 (chitoseame – which literally translates as thousand year candy) to ensure a long life. And, as Wikipedia usefully explains, the biggest difference between the samurai times and today’s celebrations, is that a “more modern practice is photography”.

As bustling as it was due to the festival, it seems quite serene in this photo:

But if you look a little higher over the bridge:

Next on the Enoden Line (electric railway) to Hase-dera. This temple is located on a hillside, and houses the rotating bookcase that I already have a vlog of.

The last picture is the shrine to unborn children that die during pregnancy. The statues go on and on. A nice touch on the money and flowers usually brought to shrines, this one is full of chocolate and sweets.

Of course, being a few minutes away, we couldn’t not take a peek at the Daibutsu:

I’ve been five times now, and each time the sky has been different. Towards the end of my stay in Japan, please remind me to put a picture of each visit together in one blog entry. It really does change the whole look and feel of the place.

The final stop was further along the railway to Enoshima Island. This was a rather fantastic journey as you are travelling along the coast, so at times all you can see is sea. There were a few schools that we passed on the way, and brilliantly timed with the school rush-hour, it was a bit of a squeeze. Still, nothing like authentic Japanese culture.

We arrived as the sun was setting, which meant for many photo opportunities:



To be perfectly honest, writing this up three months later meant that the sequence of events didn't flow perfectly in my mind. Still, I'm pretty sure I got everything down that I wanted to. Further reason for me to be so thankful that I kept this blog running. It's going to be a shame, when my time in Japan will be over, and I'll have little to write about.

NOVA Students Say The Stupidest Things #40

Phil: Are you interested in dinosaurs?
Student: Yeah, I love giraffic park.

Oh yes, that horrific place where the long-necked ones hunt unsuspecting bystanders.

¿Dónde están los aseos?

May I direct your attention over to the links section on the right of this page, where you'll find a direct pathway to the soon-to-be rather exciting website of a certain brother of mine.

Journeyman Dan is a great way of seeing photos and a diary of his travels across South America, while following his route via the interactive map.

I'm a little jealous of how shiny and new the site is. But I'm more envious of the adventure in store.

Still, I'm pretty content in little Japan. Which isn't that little; as I'm sure to point out over the extent of his trip, in terms of population, Mexico City is still number two to Tokyo.

As you can tell, just a smidgen jealous!

Image Of The Week #28

One of the most delightful things about choosing restaurants in Japan is that they all have wax versions of the food in a display outside. Unbelieavably lifelike, they also serve a second use; foreigners can point at what they want without having to decipher a menu.

This restaurant's standards are, let's say, slipping a little.

(Tsunashima, 16th Feb 2007)

NOVA Students Say The Stupidest Things #39

Discussing pets:

Phil: In English, we think that there are dog people and cat people. Are you a dog person or a cat person?
Female Student: I'm a dog.

Chocolate Heaven Since...Umm, 2007

I received chocolates today! Wasn't sure if I would, but I'm thrilled.

First off was from one of my Kinders, Moe, who is six. She informed me that it was 本命 (given to a loved one) and made me eat some in front of her. She gave me a big hug and seemed happy that I was beaming.

Next was from another Kinder, Mana. This time it was "only obligation chocolate" but she'd put quite a bit of effort into it, drawing a picture of a rather ruggedly handsome man, whom I'm assuming is a portrait of me.


From the next group up, at the age of 7, Kanna gave me the most amazing present of the three. Really shy, she handed me a package at the end and ran straight off before I could say thank you.


It was only tonight that I opened it and realised I'd received the much sought after Holy Grail of Valentine's chocolates - 手作り - hand-made chocolate. Beautifully presented, it seems a shame to eat them! I can't wait to see her and give her a huge hug.



It took me a second to realise the 'no' formed 'no-va'!


At Keiko's house tonight, I received even more home-made chocolate - white chocolate with strawberries, truffles, and brownies! - which I really didn't expect.



I only hope it wasn't 'obligation chocolate'!

Valentine's Day Rules...

...if you're a male in Japan.

In an intriguing twist on proceedings, the commercialism of Valentine's Day decreed that girls present boys with gifts on this wondrous of occassions.

There's very little actual sentiment or romantic indications surrounding the festival, but millions upon millions of yen are spent on gifts. 本命 (hon-mei) chocolate is given to loved ones, or to people you have a crush on. Even stronger, 手作り (te-tsukuri) is hand-made chocolate. The market is phenomenal; shops have shelves and shelves of cooking equipment set up weeks before.

However, rather funny is the third type of chocolate given. ぎり (giri) pretty much translates as 'obligation'. This is handed to bosses, friends, class-mates and co-workers even though many people feel ripped off at having to buy many items. It really boils down to the chocolate companies making a fortune through the threat and guilt of not buying their products because everyone else is.

Fantastic marketing.

This all sounds great for men, but unfortunately there is a catch.

Exactly one month later, on the 14th March, is White Day; reversing the direction of presents. Boys have to answer to any chocolate given from admirers, as well as repay obligation chocolates. And, of course, the shops up the prices even more. Chocolate isn't actually given on this day, instead cookies or candy; the name itself originates from the marshmallows that were originally* at the fore.

So not only do men get ripped off even more than woman, but that Japan has two commercial days, instead of the typical one in the West, seems ridiculously crazy for them to still go along with it!

Happy Valentine's Day, wherever you are! x x

*I wanted to write 'tradition' but that's hardly fitting for such a recent holiday.

M on a T

Forget "Snakes on a Plane". "Masks on a Train" is back, with a vengeance.

The early sunsets again mean that Spring is upon us, sadly bringing with it hayfever season. Which consequently result in a large number of the population wearing the white masks.

I remember arriving during the peak of the allergy season last year and being a little freaked out by the number of people concealing their faces in that slightly paedophilic/masochistic way.

Interesting fact. The word 'allergy' has been painfully adapted into Japanese as a 外来語 (gairaigo - a foreign loan word) as アレルーギ which reads as 'a-re-roo-gi'*. Plenty of words in Japanese have foreign bases, but not all from English as I perhaps over-confidently believed. Many have Portuguese, Dutch, French, German, and Russian backgrounds; among other countries. A good list is here.

It's quite fun to guess the contortion. For example (highlight for answers):

ソフトクリーム sofutokurīmu soft ice-cream
パソコン pasokon PC (personal computer)
ボールペン bōrupen ball-point pen
セクハラ sekuhara sexual harassment

Another interesting fact. Hayfever has only been a problem for the last decade or so in Tokyo. Can anyone work out why?

*These words all take the Katakana （カタカナ） form, the more basic letters. Original Japanese is in Kanji （漢字） or the other script, Hiragana （ひらがな）.

Image Of The Week #27

When I was about 15, I walked home from school one day through Winton Rec. On reaching the playground, I saw the most incredible rainbow. Nothing special about it, but for that moment I felt that I was lucky and should use it as a symbol that, to use another set of weather terminology, every cloud has a silver lining. Nothing was wrong and I didn't mean it for any particular situation, but just in general. I can't explain it properly but that moment stayed with me for a long time. I never experienced it again until last weekend.

(Tsunashima, 11th Feb 2007)

The Winter meant that sunset happened before I finished work on the weekends at 5:40. However, this was the first weekend that I managed to catch the skyline before it turned dark. The train ride home was simply breath-taking; there's one section for about one minute which is just open and flat with no buildings so you can see the mountains in the background. The sky was tinted red at the bottom with the silhouette of land only arched skywards by the outline of Mt Fuji. I had exactly the same feeling, and the memory fled back.

Unfortunately, I didn't have my camera handy, but got this one on Tsunashima Bridge. Although you can see the colour of the sunset and Fuji just sticking up in the middle, it doesn't do justice to the panoramic view from the train.

I'll be ready next weekend.

Brief Encounter

My woeful tale needs some back-story before I begin.

An Izakaya - meaning "to remain in a sake shop" - is a popular bar type hang-out for groups of people after work. They're pretty fantastic; with many types of drinks and a hearty selection of snacky foods which everyone shares. The food is cheap - about £1 per plate - so you keep ordering and picking away at it. An example of a menu can be found here. Seating is usually on tatami mats or cushions with tables lowered into the ground.

A Snack is a bit more upmarket, where customers are usually long-running friends with the woman that runs it. They're smaller, more elite (although anyone is welcome) and the 'hostess' drinks with the customers. Prices aren't set; instead a substantial amount is usually handed over at the end.

Keiko's Dad comes to Tokyo on business once or twice a month, and usually goes to one for some drinks. We met him a few weeks ago and he took us to a Snack in central Tokyo which, incidentally, appears to be famous; the President of NOVA goes there. I met Mama (the name given to a Snack hostess) and we ate, drank and laughed with her for a few hours. It was a great evening, and I couldn't wait to go back.

About two weeks ago, Keiko recieved a phone call from her father saying that a man who spent time in England would like to meet us for dinner one night and chat in English with me. Of course, I couldn't say no to her Dad and I wanted to go back, so I said yes.

On Sunday night, we went to the bar, but Keiko and I were the first ones there. The man, a Mr Suzuki, turned up about 10 minutes later. Before any introductions, he told me that he wouldn't be paying me tonight but from now on we would meet once or twice a month and he would pay for dinner and a fee of 6000 yen (about £30) per time.

I had absolutely no idea what was going on; Mama, not speaking English, was oblivious; Keiko and I both dropped our mouths and looked at each-other in a "what the hell?" way. But, I couldn't say no. For one, we were waiting for her Dad still and it would've been a slightly awkward meeting. But more importantly, it was a business contact of Keiko's father, so I felt obliged to say yes.

In all honest truth, I wouldn't have been so against meeting this man, but quickly I didn't like his manners. For someone wanting to practice English, he'd speak in one-word answers, wouldn't ask me anything, ignored Keiko, and talked about himself in the third person. Arrogant and self-obsessed, he kept talking about how he was a President of a company and how rich he was.

At that point, I asked how long he knew Mr Terui. He didn't. Mama had told him about me.

Suddenly, I realised that I had no obligations to meet this man again, but I still felt that it could cause tension between Mama and her customers in the future, so I went along with it.

Keiko's Dad arrived and quietly she started explaining what was going on to him while I distracted Suzuki. I think it was also dawning on Mama that things weren't so rosy. I don't think she knew he wanted to make this a long term thing. I also felt that the way he kept talking about my services to him, how unpersonal he was, and the way he'd pay me, made me feel a little escort-like. And you know, it's going to take a lot more than £30 and dinner to prostitute myself!

Mr Terui understood quickly, and swiftly started commenting about how busy I was at work, and that we had to leave as we had reservations at a restaurant.

The man gave me his business card and asked me to e-mail him. Is it rude of me if I don't?

It was a very confusing and awkward situation, where I had no idea what to say. Afterwards, I apologised to Mr Terui but he told me that it wasn't a problem and definitely not my fault.

I doubt I'll be going back to the Snack for a long time.

Spitting Image

While organising my images I found this strange coincidence.

These are pictures of the kite at the Ramen Museum and the kite that my student gave me for New Year. The similarities are uncanny - the blue head, the pattern on the clothes, the hair style and so on. I'm guessing that this is more than just chance, and will investigate over the next few days. I feel a little Antiques Roadshow.


gggg GIFT FROM STUDENT? ggggggggg RAMEN MUSEUM?

Fingers Crossed

That's an expression that needs to be explained to all students. Even a demonstration doesn't do the trick.

(They also cannot grasp the concept of Hangman. As simple as it sounds to us, try explaining it out loud. It gets so frustrating trying to get a group of adults to play a simple childrens' game. As much as you push them to guess letters, they aren't interested; instead, trying to guess the word with all the spaces blank.)

Many, symbols gestures and hand movements have completely different meanings or methods.

For example: the motion to shoo someone away, but bringing the hand backwards instead of forwards, means "come here". A tick means work is wrong, and a circle means it's correct. Counting 6,7,8,9 and 10 is done by placing the relevant amount of extra fingers (after 5) on an open palm. And holding your hands up in an 'X' suggests "no". Do we do the last one in England? I can't remember; seriously, it seems second nature to me now.

The other reason for this post was that for some strange and completely unsubstantiated reason I feel a big earthquake coming. I have no experience whatsoever with this type of thing, but it's niggling. Fingers crossed it won't come true.

Or should that be "knock on wood"? Whatever that means.

Random Thoughts From The Brink Of Sleep

Can sand be hoovered?

And if so, how much sand can one hoover take?

Who Knew

Whenever I hear the following line in a movie or somewhere, I always think the person is saying "You're encourageable".

I only just found out they say "You're incorrigible".

I didn't even know such a word existed.

Any other words or song lyrics that you confuse?

Happy National Foundation Day

Today, February 11, celebrates the founding of the nation of Japan by Emperor Jimmu. Although discredited now, largely due to the embarrassments of WWII, the day was re-established in 1966, as a day for patriotism and citizenship.

A much larger and more favoured occassion is Constitution Memorial Day on May 3, which glorifies Article 9:

Aspiring sincerely to an international peace based on justice and order, the Japanese people forever renounce war as a sovereign right of the nation and the threat or use of force as means of settling international disputes.

第九条　日本国民は、正義と秩序を基調とする国際平和を誠実に希求し、国権の発動たる戦争と、武力による威嚇又は武力の行使は、国際紛争を解決する手段としては、永久にこれを放棄する。

In order to accomplish the aim of the preceding paragraph, land, sea, and air forces, as well as other war potential, will never be maintained. The right of belligerency of the state will not be recognized.

二　前項の目的を達するため、陸海空軍その他の戦力は、これを保持しない。国の交戦権は、これを認めない。

The Pleasure And Pain Principle

After work last night, I went for a run at the gym. Afterwards, I was in the shower, and I had a shave. It may sound strange, but the sinks in the changing room bit have only cold water, and if you've put blade to face it's not such an exciting prospect. Soapily, I dropped my razor onto my foot and, before I knew it, there was blood gushing out of my toe. I don't think I've ever bled so much. It was just flowing and flowing. All I had was my towel and I didn't know what to do.

I held the cold water to my toe for a few minutes, but no change. I tried holding my foot up to slow down the blood flow, but that was just messy, and I looked like the crazy foreigner doing strange yoga-style stretches in the nude. As that suggests, no-one stopped to help. Thanks guys!

Finally, I gave up, held my (white) towel to my toe, and tried to stop the blood. This didn't help much so I made a mad dash for my locker: holding a blood-stained towel in one hand, leaving a trail of blood behind me, and the woman who was cleaning looking like she'd wasted her time.

I wrapped a plaster around it, and it bled through, but I got home and sorted it out.

Plasters are an incredible thing, and they've always proved useful to me and others I meet on my travels. You shouldn't be without one or two.

I know the gym wasn't going to be easy but this, this was ridiculous!

!

The evening turned out to be more interesting than I ever realised.

I'm too exhausted, and confused, to write about it tonight.

All The Good Ones Go

First Lolo Ferrari, now Anna Nicole Smith.

I know it's totally unrelated but it's even on the News here.

Poor girl. It's going to be one of those cases where we'll never even get close to the truth, but: with fortunes gained and lost, court cases a-plenty, many divorces, her oldest son dying two months ago and the mystery around the causes, and paternity questions about her new-born daughter, she never really had a chance.

?

I have a rather interesting dinner date tonight.

One More Jam

I knew I had a third picture lying around somewhere.



I know this entry is a complete waste of your time to read, but I was getting frustrated looking for this picture, so when I finally found it, it deserved to feature. You wasted even more time reading this too!

Image Of The Week #26

(Kagurazaka, 1st Feb 2007)

So close, yet again!

Is hot yoga famous back home?

A Room With A Futon

It's been a long time coming, but my room was finally tidy enough to show you. As you can see, it's a pretty decent size; much bigger than many rooms in Japan, but not quite 'Cribs' size. The floor area is 6 tatami mats, and when my futon (sheets were in the wash) is folded up, it looks even bigger. The balcony is a nice feature, and although in Winter the big double glass doors build up a lot of condensation, it allows a lot of light and fresh air in.



The coolest thing is the amount of wardrobe space I have. The bottom area is big enough to store my futon, suitcases, and a lot more leftover. However, joined to my door, accessing more than one section at a time, is like a puzzle, sliding each door in turn.





There's plenty of place for 2 and maybe 3 people to sleep, so if anyone finds themselves in my neck of the woods. The rest of the apartment is, thanks to Tom and Bruce, too disgusting to show you right now.